FL Review - Abbey's Secret Ale SIAC (Mini Spped Bumps)

  • Originally reviewed on January 29, 2011

  • Texture retired in April, 2010

  • Pros: Intense texture.

  • Cons:Was a "hit-or-miss" texture that required some patience to be enjoyed.

  • Original Score under RPP 1 rules: 47/ 50


The Abbey's Secret Ale was another of the SIAC v2.0 set sold by ILF during 2009. This SIAC had a mouth orifice and the texture was a scaled down Speed Bump texture. Unfortunately, this SIAC was retired from the market back in April 2010, but it could be resurrected by ILF in the future.

As with all SIACs, the first thing that caught your attention was the can form and the label. In this case, Abbey's label was the most stylish (next to the Succu-Dry). When I removed the top cap for the first time, I was impressed on how realistic and inviting the small mouth looked compared to the generic "Jabba the Hut" full size mouth orifice.  The first impression when inserting a finger inside was "This thing is tight". And tight it was...

The mini speed bump was one of those "hit or miss" textures; sometimes it felt great, at others it was kind of "so-so". Like the mini Vortex, Abbey didn't do it for me the first few times I used it. Originally, it took me like 5 uses to finally decipher this SIAC. Once I went slowly with it, Abbey's intensity showed up. The bumps made themselves present pressing around my dick with every stroke. Because it was a SIAC, the Abbey was tight and when the texture worked, orgasms were brutal.

It is a shame that ILF discontinued this SIAC model. It is still one of my favorite toys when I want an intense session that forces me to take it easy to last for more than 10 minutes. The closest thing ILF has to the mini Speed Bump is the mini STU available as Grape Jack Soda from their Fleshjack line.

 ¡Viva La Casqueta!